Important Tips for Effective Communication with Your Child. Have you ever wondered why women, especially mothers, talk so much? Is it just a habit or is there a deeper reason behind it? Science shows that it is not just a coincidence, but a biological necessity. Most of the development of a newborn’s brain happens in the first few years, and the most stimulation to this development comes from language — and that too from the mother’s voice.
The power of mother’s voice and ‘motherese’
When a baby is born, his brain is not fully developed. It has neurons (nerve cells), but they need stimulation to connect with each other. And this stimulation comes from language. This is why a mother talking to the baby, singing songs, or telling stories helps strengthen the baby’s brain.
A mother’s voice is usually high, sweet and emotional. Scientifically it is called ‘motherese’ — that is, the special style in which a mother talks to her baby. This voice is the most pleasant and attractive to the baby’s ears. Perhaps this is the reason why a child responds to his mother’s voice before his father’s, and perhaps that is why we call our first language ‘mother tongue’.
Two aspects of language skills: Receptive and Expressive
When we talk about a child’s language development, we have to focus on two types of skills:
- Receptive language skills – that is, what the child is listening to, what he is able to understand.
- Expressive language skills – that is, what the child is able to say on his own.
The mother should stimulate the child as much as possible through words. The rule of “the more, the better” applies to receptive skills. But remember – one should avoid baby talk with children, because children learn by watching us. Teach them the language that they can use later in society.
It is important to have a little patience for expressive skills. Children speak when they are ready for it. If the child mispronounces or makes grammatical mistakes, do not interrupt him. For example, if the child says, “Mommy, potty,” you reply, “Hey! Baby has to go potty?” — this way you are teaching him the correct language, without discouraging him.
Effective ways to talk to children
Now the question arises, how to talk to children? How to ensure that language development takes place at both levels – listening as well as speaking? For this, there are certain techniques that mothers and caregivers can use:
Description
When you are doing something with the child, express everything in words. For example – “Now mommy is putting a nappy on you so that you feel comfortable”, or “Now we are bathing you, look at this cute soap!”.
This helps the child associate things and actions with names.
Parallel Talk
This conversation focuses on the child’s work. For example – “You are now playing with your toy”, or “You are now drinking water from your bottle.” This teaches the child how to express in words what they are doing.
Self-Talk
In this, the mother describes her own work. For example – “Now mummy will feed you green peas”, or “I am now going to take out your clothes so that we can go to the park.”
This technique is very useful in daily routine, such as at bedtime or mealtime, when children can be adamant.
Expansion
When the child says something incomplete, you complete it and say it. For example – the child says, “Teddy”, then you say, “Your teddy bear is very cute!” This teaches the child how to put feelings in a complete sentence.
Expansion Plus
In this, you take the child’s talk forward. For example, if the child says, “Look at the crow”, then you say, “Yes, look! It is a crow and it is black in colour.” This helps the child to expand and describe the sentence.
The natural process of learning a language
We all learned our mother tongue in the same way – by listening, watching and speaking. We were never given grammar books, nor did anyone teach us Subject-Verb Agreement. We just listened, understood, repeated and learnt to speak with experience.
So if you want your child to learn to speak well, then speak with him, speak a lot, and speak daily. Talking not only develops his language, but it also strengthens the emotional bond between you and your child.
Conclusion
Language is not just a means of communication, it is the foundation of a child’s mental, social and emotional development. Every sentence connected with your voice, your words, and your touch creates new links in the child’s brain. And these links form the basis of future personality, understanding and confidence. So the next time you talk to your child, know that you are not just talking, you are shaping his future.
